I am currently feeling as though I am on a steep learning curve going nowhere fast. Even though I am progressing and getting better with every ride I find that I sometimes get frustrated by my seeming lack of advancement.

I guess realistically I am doing well for where I am and where I started. I started riding three years ago as an older teen. Had sub-par training for the first year and a half of my riding. Have recently been with a good dressage trainer riding her horse.

I am really learning to ride on this horse, not just be a passenger. He's really helping me with my aids and timing and feel. My walk and rising trot are pretty good, canter is fine, sitting trot is coming one stride at a time, but is not there yet. I find myself after every ride wanting more . . . and more and more.

Ideally I could pause the rest of my life and spend a year riding, find a working student position and throw myself into the deep end of the pool and really learn. But I don't think I could do that at this point.

I guess what I really want to know is, am I being too hard on myself. How fast can one expect to progress with once/twice a week riding. I don't even know where I want to be . . .

I'm confused.

Mr. Studly McSexyGelderson

So one of the mares on the property is in season, and is really in season. Today was the second ride alone without the instructor. Had planned to go with the flow and see what happened. Goals were to stay connected and soft and rythmic the whole time. Well plans changed.

We walked out the barn towards the outdoor arena and flirty mare starts making flirty little mare noises. Well my normally well mannered cool, calm and collected 100% gelding turns into Mr. Studly McSexyGelderson. Little whickery noises and arched neck and some jogging around. Fantastic. We walk aroud the outdoor arena inhand and he comes back to earth we are cool and calm. Head to the mounting block, have some moving around and fussing. I get on and the mare decides that she needs "T" now, cue screaming and cantering up and down the paddock which is right beside the outdoor arena of course. He picks up on this and heads her way, don't think so mister how about we head down to the far end of the arena instead. Well he didn't think that my idea was as much fun as I thought, canter pirouette followed by some crow hopping. I've had enough of the nonsense. We get down to "work".

Didn't really get too much accomplished, he was really distracted the whole ride. Disconnected front and back.

Riding again tomorrow. Will ride inside in the dressage saddle with a quick lunge before to get him moving, then an easy relaxed mosy around the outdoor arena in the AP saddle to get used to it.